She's JV to your varsity
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
You really realize what your life's become when you're sitting alone in the house crying in a santa hat and pjs getting stoned on christmas eve before noon.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize