I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Just discovered evidence of drunken eBay bid. Drunk Mike did pretty good -- I'm getting a new sleeping bag.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
Randomize
