farters have to be the big spoon...
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Dennis picked up a 50 year old woman. Then he and Dan got in a fight and jumped out of the limo. No one knows what happened to them.
Randomize
