I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Nyquil jello-shots aiding in health and happiness
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
Lesson learnt. Sex toy cleaning spray is not an acceptable substitute to clean your glasses with.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
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