what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Randomize
