Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
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