dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
Randomize
