i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
Randomize
