ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
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