sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
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