It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
