i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
