could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
