Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
