: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize
