i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
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