My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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