It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Hey, you know that marble art statue thing in your bedroom? Hypothetically what would happen if a penis got stuck in it?
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize