the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Randomize
