She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
