Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
