She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
