I'm gonna have a badass scar
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
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