omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
