i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
You're like the fucking Mozart of sexting.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize