i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize
