Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I'm on the same pooping schedule as a professor I've never had. He now says what's up to me in the hallway
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
