I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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