I want to stick my p in your. b.
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
Randomize
