I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
This baby is an asshole
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
WELP I KNOW THE HAPPY HOUR DRINKS WERE GOOD BECAUSE MOM JUST INFORMED ME I AM THE RESULT OF POKED HOLE IN THE DIAPHRAGM
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
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