I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
It wasn't until I took a shit, that I remembered that you assholes started spiking my shots with tobasco when I wasn't looking last night. Dicks.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Imma need a double jack on the rocks and a BJowsky from the hot bartender.
Yes I said BJOWSKY. Pronounced "buh jow skii".
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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