Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
how many americans can say they have been laid before eating their first big mac?
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
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