I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize