just tell him i said nine months
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
