Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
