I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
