PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
