Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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