we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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