i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Randomize
