my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Randomize
