Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
That is priceless. You walk into her house, fuck her husband and demand Chinese food. Your an inspiration to us all.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Randomize
