ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
Non-Jews are for practice
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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