problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I don't think you understand I turned down McDonalds for you.
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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