Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
Randomize
