I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
Randomize
