I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Found her grinding on my boss with her tongue down her throat last night. Guess who just got promoted!
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
