let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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