I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
In other news, I just burned my penis
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
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