Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
